I did it again. I’ve misbehaved – and we’re talking big time stuff….

After the UN meetings yesterday, we hung around at the head quarters for a bit, and who did we bump into but the American President - George Shrub or something his name was. Anyway, Wally is really good at talking to the big wigs, so he wangled the four of us a ride on Airforce One to go see Basherdog, who also lives in America. Basherdog is our first official visit. Maybe she can tell us about the grievances of dogs in America. Now my Mum and I sometimes watch Animal Planet, and they show programs of special police people who target nasty people who are mean or neglectful to animals (my Mum either rants at the telly or cries, when the animals are suffering, so I don’t let her watch it anymore). I think having police control how people handle animals would be a good thing in any country. I just hope Basherdog will be in, or Wally and I will have wasted our journey.

Right, back to the ride we hitched. We got on board with George and his wife Mrs. Shrub. We got cozy in some luxurious chairs, and George called one of his staff, and asked him to bring us his special Texan Barbecue Beef Jerky. He did! A huge platter piled high with this stuff. Now you know I have a problem with meat products, and yes you guessed right, I gorged myself. Not a problem at first, but suddenly my guts were just contracting in really painful spasms. I thought, “That man has tried to poison me”. So I gave him a little nip on the ankle. Wally told me to calm down, and Picklelicious rolled her eyes at me. Then I just concentrated really hard on not squirting liquid poo everywhere. Not easy considering the pressure of gas that was building up.

We finally touched down, and I ran to the door of the plane. No sooner had they opened the door, but I jumped out and squatted and started emptying myself. Ohhh my word, what a relief. I hadn’t noticed that George and Laura were right behind me, waving to the official welcoming committee. Wally gave me a real tired look…. How was I to know!!

The paparazzi was there too of course, so tomorrow when you see me shitting on the flight steps of the Airforce One, it was not a political statement, just a very urgent call of nature. (several photos of the event, unfortunately won´t upload on UD - maybe it´s the CIA, who are obstructing the showing of this photographic evidence - but hey here´s one that will show - courtesy of Wally DUNGCAT!....).

I rang and told my mother, what had happened. Strangely enough she never gave me a bollocking. She just said, “Never mind, Son” and chuckled. Hmmhhh.. I wonder what that was all about.

Anyway got to go – I don’t think I unloaded all that beef jerky.

See ya!

Mikkel